Qin Weiqi painted
Everyone hides secrets of nowhere to vent, there must be a corner, take your fragile sadness, loneliness, joy.
How many people have uneventfully it all, when looking back, only to find that he has left nothing and uncertain?
I used to like the lines in a TV series-“fate, there is time, not an automatic seek casual, with a sincere hope to make numerous choices … … Funny is not the time, but I lost count of hesitation. ”
I have often thought if I chose another path will be happier than today?
That sound to be happy
I had a name “Vera”, which is said to have my mom gave birth to me the first night, dream flowers, just give me this name. From small to large, I tame and well-behaved, never rebellious. My life is like a road that has no turning, go straight along the established route, don’t have any waves.
My performance has been good, graduating that year, I can stay in first-tier cities foreign-owned companies to work, parents are trying to persuade me to come back. I hesitated for two or three months.
Parents on the grounds that: girls outside world is not easy, a city a fast-paced, high levels of consumption, life is very difficult.
But I’m not afraid of hardship, my heart filled with dreams of a woman. At that time our class and I get employed by foreign companies or with another girl, and we try and get.
She was determined, she said, “my life on my own, why let someone else?”
I admire her courage and decisiveness. Probationary period is really very hard, work overtime every day until the wee hours do not say, wages are pitiful. Accidentally do wrong, no one will pity you, survival of the fittest, everyone trying to climb.
I was tired, and parents continue to persuade, I finally gave up.
Home the other day, female classmates cried in my arms, I say: “you must go, even my dreams come true. ”
Home job is easy, but often left me feeling empty. After two years of work, the age to marry, married parents started calling in, this seems to be the way to every woman.
At that time I had a “crush”, was I met working in a foreign company, after coming home and we have been keeping in touch. Once in a while he’s in a bad mood, I’ll be talking to him all night.
He came to see me. It was a spring, light breeze, everybody scattered petals. He said: “your city, it’s beautiful, just like your name. ”
His words made my heart bloom. We held hands, had a parting hug, love only one. He said: “Although the city is beautiful, but you need to get out and see more exciting world. ”
He was transferred to Shanghai in a large enterprise, opening up markets in Southeast Asia, one-third time of each year on a business trip.
I also want to follow love, tell him to go to Shanghai, and there’s hesitation hesitation inside. I am used to a life of ease, I’m afraid I can’t adapt to the fast pace of the city, also worried that if he really loved me, if he travel all year round, we get far more, feeling there must be changes. Hesitating, my relationship with him was gradually faded. At the time, introduced by relatives and later husband, the great thing about I know (not his real name).
The great thing about civil servants, life is very rule. He doesn’t smoke or drink, exercise three times a week, like watching political news, cell phone to play games. This man is entirely in the eyes of parents “good son” standards.
I tried to contact with the great thing about, not particularly like, but don’t hate.
The great thing about my pursuit is always right, watching movies shopping eating, plenty of time getting around, as if a task was completed according to plan and end up waiting for leadership for approval.
After six months, my approval is through!
In my opinion, and the great thing about getting married, although much less passion, is not all that interesting, but at least secure and safe. My life is not safe yet?
Quiet life waves
Getting married, having a baby, everything went smoothly. Trouble and her mother-in-law, quarrel between husband and wife is often noisy, but day was always plain to have it.
I thought my life would ever so slowly. I don’t even want to cheer his old life – volleyball, dance the square dance, travel … …
I did not expect, to the beach in quiet backwaters, dropping a Boulder.
To talk about things from a husband who cheated on. That’s right, honest man, is not necessarily eternal loyalty.
That was in early 2016, children attend preschool, and I plan to save tens of thousands of dollars for him before out of his interest in class and buy an education insurance. But I suddenly found that card it’s empty!
Know the card’s password, just me and my husband, I’ll ask him.
He faltered, said a friend in urgent need of money, he lent to friends.
“How dynamic you son?” I was so angry, “how much money you have, how much you lend him, this is your reach, you can’t lose to help friends!”
The great thing about to guarantee, he must give the money back, never to happen again.
I am a very sensitive person, and I always felt he was lying. Azongting mean, mean to your family, how is it possible to borrow a large sum of money to a friend?
This is fishy. I started to look out for him. I found him to be one of the games has reached addictive proportions, and then he set the phone protection password … …
Finally, one day, I sneak peek at his power on password, put down. All truth!
He jumped, a year ago. Object is a woman he should play the game know, spent 12 years younger than him. This year, he gave women brand handbags, perfumes, clothes, holiday network red envelopes, the son of “petty cash” spent!
Women are finally “from” him, and let him Chase. He tells women to his hotel room that day, also is pleased with his buddies to show off. It is nasty!
I suddenly realized that he had picked the wrong person, wrong way! always thought no thorns road has been unblocked, also encountered a stumbling block in the Middle! it might as well have been the desired path, despite difficulties and obstacles, but in the end is the magnificent scenery of … …
I really regret my life, for a man who betrayed me.
Probably because not enough love him, my feelings of anger than sorrow. One night, in-laws to dinner. I had sent his son back, but ahead of in-laws, says the great thing about cheating.
They were all shocked. In particular, the great thing about, he always think he hid it well.
This cowardly man, put all the blame on “possessed”. He did not agree with divorce, he swore off that woman. He was even in the presence of parents, kneel down and beg my pardon.
Looking at his counsels, and I think he’s funny like a clown. I had selected a husband!
On divorce, my parents are strongly against it. They feel that all this to his son: “you hold the taunt, he owed it to you, listens to you in the future. ”
Are you? the choice makes me confused. Our dismal marriage, can only be so off.
Few had the courage to start all over again
The great thing about separate days of the cold war, I met a man.
Once I followed the unit to travel together, my English is bad, the course of the play, act as their “tour guide” and “bargaining tool”. That trip, we had a great time.
On the trip, a Guangdong’s older brother, he does not understand a word of English, even dared to travel. His luggage at the airport in a foreign country, do not understand English, can only help one side of me. Later, he told us the same right to go to the city, he would have the gall, in our midst, we eat and drink mix.
Big brother is outgoing and easygoing, informal, release is also very generous, and we all love him.
One night, our Pavilion in a bed and breakfast in chat, people dispersed, leaving only a brother and I. We talked about what had happened. Big brother told me that he and his wife divorced, has a 12-year old daughter. Divorce for the simple reason-the concept is different.
“She will save money, not enjoy, than go out to play, one stuffy … … Later, there was a time my business is bad, she has done a good job, promotion and pay rise. She was afraid I hurt her, we have no communication for a long time, finally filed for divorce. ”
I was surprised: “divorce for this thing? so not worth it?”
He smiled: “what is not worth? people live, most of all, fun. Two people happy together, was dragged down to each other. ”
Big brother business better, and make money, he used to travel, he said we should not be slaves to the money, it just means we enjoy life.
To be honest, I kind of admire him for big brother.
After returning home, brother and contact me. Sometimes sent me some interesting pictures and sometimes travel to other places or to talk about his business, and will also shoot videos for me.
Big brother wants to find me, but reminds me of the crush of the object before, I was afraid of my feelings and big brother goes so fast, final is disappointing, I turned him down.
“You come to Guangdong! you look at how my day is spent. There are numerous choices in life and wrong not to be afraid, we can find another way to go. “He said.
In my thinking.
However, it was discovered by the great thing about this social information–in fact, he’s been looking my move, always wanted to find where I made a mistake.
He put this uproar, accusing me of “infidelity”, as if you can hide the errors he had made. And then he told me: “I cheated on you, you have betrayed me, even now, we continue to live. ”
I sneer at, say only two words: “divorce!”
I spent half a year dealing with divorce, I basically won. I did not continue to contact brother, I do not believe in love. I just feel like wasted big good youth, in Exchange for such a result, it is really sad.
This spring, I met the girl in a foreign company-she just realized I didn’t finish his dream. She became the youngest female leaders in the company, salary is very considerable.
But she told me with a wry smile: “I lost two children, before the return to position. When I really wanted a baby when the doctor said I may lose the opportunity of being a mother … … Maybe this year I will divorce her husband. “In life, in fact, there are homes.
She also told me that I have a crush on the man, has quit. He went to marry an ordinary woman, lived a most ordinary days.
He was busy, almost death. He had seen everything. He said to me: “if I had, I didn’t let her come to Shanghai, but I left in her city, and her chatter flowers, walking, zhanqiangz, that would be much better … … All the blame, the right time. ”
Indeed, life left us with a lot of regrets, and we can only go on with regrets.